Good bye Kindergarten
When Left to Their Own Devices. . . August 22, 2009
I will be the first to admit that I’m not very good about getting the laundry hot out of the dryer so I don’t have to iron. Thus, I’m usually left with a LOT of clothes to iron out. TodayI decided it would be a good day – hot and humid – again - to tackle it. The kids weren’t fighting with each other so I set myself up in the bedroom and started tackling Mount St. Oh My Gosh That’s a Lot to Iron. A 1/2 hour passed, the kids weren’t fighting, so I kept going. Another 1/2 hour passed – it’s sad to admit I really did have that much ironing and folding stacked up – and the kids weren’t fighting so I decided to keep going. Wait a minute! The kids aren’t fighting. For an hour. They aren’t fighting. OMG someone’s hurt and dying and the other isn’t coming to tell me. So I decided I better go and check on them.
When Mommy's not around
Caught. . .
They had every pillow and cushion and even pillows from their beds on the floor. The couches were their “ships”. Well, at least they weren’t fighting. . .
To a Friend. . . August 13, 2009
My heart is breaking a little bit this week. An amazing friend is moving away, very far way. I know it’s hard for her to go and equally hard for me to see her leave. Will she still be an amazing woman in her new home? ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY YES! Will she still be a friend even though she won’t be a few minutes away? GOD, I hope so. I wish her and her family safe travels and that their future is bright and beautiful. You’ll always have a place here and in my heart. And remember – friends are like stars – you might not always see them but you know they are there.
Changes Ahead July 27, 2009
So lately with the economy the way it is, my freelance work has been really, really slow. Ok – not just slow – non-existant. I’ve been more of a SAHM than a WAHM. You would think “wow, she must have a lot of time on her hands now.” Yeah, right. When was the last time you were home with a 7 year old and a soon-to-be 2 year old. There is no such thing as “time on your hands”. The hardest part, and I can honestly say that it’s been this way for me since I quit working outside the home 3 years ago, is coming to terms with not bringing in a steady paycheck to help with the household finances. I’ve always held a paying job since the time I was 16. I worked the summers during high school, worked through college and immediately upon graduation I had a job. Outside of time off for maternity leave, I’ve never not worked and got paid for it.
I specify “got paid for it” because being a Mom and Wife is definitely a job; we just don’t get paid a paycheck for it. Yes, I do get to enjoy my children and that is a reward in itself. But having been a very independent young woman, and even when I was newly married, it was very gratifying to know that I was contributing the household finances, and if I wanted to “treat” myself with a manicure or new haircolor or new outfit, I new I “worked” for it. But there’s a difference now that I’m not working, especially now with my freelance work so slow. It may very well be my own hangup – I know it is, and I know I need to work through it. I feel guilty when I spend money on myself, even if it’s a cup of coffee, because I’m not contributing to the household finances. My heart tells me I shouldn’t because I’m doing the most important “job” I can think of, but my head sees the budget and knows that only one person is supporting our family. Some days it’s a very hard situation to reconcile. Let’s just call it a “work in progress” and take it one day at a time. For now, I’ll do what I can as far as bringing work in. I’ll save when I can, be a frugal shopper, enjoy a cup of coffee at home. And just continue to do what I can.
Giveaway from Another Mommy Blogger July 27, 2009
Another Mommy blogger, and a mommy’s group co-member, is giving away an awesome baby carrier on her blog. Here’s the link to check it out http://thoushallnotwhine.blogspot.com/2009/07/first-giveaway.html.
Synopsis of My Night July 16, 2009
Just got a visit from Plymouth’s finest. . .WTH now my chimney’s leaking. What a night – moldy cheese on my spaghetti, broken wine bottle in the frig, Crash Test (Buddha’s new name) pushes the panic button with a direct link to the police department, now the chimney’s leaking – I’m done.
Let me explain further – First, getting my dinner ready to eat and poured Parm/Reggiano cheese on my spaghetti only to find that it was moldy – Yuck. Empty plate. Start to get more but hear a crash from the refrigerator. Open the door, a wine bottle had tipped over and broken. Clean up the broken bottle and the wine that has spilled all over the door compartments. Just finish cleaning that up and the house alarm goes off. Crash Test moved a chair over to play with the lights, but I guess the alarm keypad was just too tempting so she pushed a “panic” button. It’s a direct link to the police department so they showed up within 5 minutes. She came right to the door with me and said to the officer “Me, me did.” Got that all settled, a new plate of food for me, Bug in the shower, and I sat down to eat. In between the roar of the thunder I hear a distinct “plop, plop” coming from the fireplace – water’s leaking down the chimney. Wait a minute – I hear another “drip, plop” sound coming from the mudroom. Yup, sure enough I’ve got a leak there too now. I’m really done now – tomorrow’s another day. And for those of you that think being a SAHM or WAHM is easy – this all has happened since 7:40 tonight and the time is now 9:40 p.m.
Just ventured outside to see why all the cars are turning around on our street – it’s flooded knee deep. Can this night get any better.
I Remember When. . . June 25, 2009
I remember when I was 23. I remember late nights out with my friends. I remember the freedom of not knowing where my life was going and constantly changing my mind about what I was going to do with my life. I remember living in no less than 6 different places between the ages of 22 – 25 and a few roommates from hell. I remember dating a least the same number of guys in the same number of years. I remember feeling like someone was digging my heart out with a old, dull spoon every time one of the (well at least 2 of them broke up with me). I remember some of the stupid decisions I made along the way – not quite remembering how I got home after a late night out at the bar, doing 95 (and faster) on I-95 after last call, giving a complete stranger - really a dance with a guy at a club does not mean you know him – a ride home and go in for a “cup of coffee” – Yeah right. Stupid, stupid decisions, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Do I regret doing some of the things I did? Yup. Am I thankful every day that I made it out alive from that time in my life? You betcha. Am a grateful that I Higher Authority kept me save and everyone around me save from harm? YES!
So why am I writing all this out? One – because it’s 1:50 in the morning and I can’t sleep. Two – because I feel it’s very therapeautic to reflect back on certain times of you life and realize how far you’ve come (and how thoroughly stupid you were with some of the decisions you’ve made). And three – because I hope someone of my what dozen followers and find a lesson for themselves that I’ve already lived through.
It wasn’t easy being that age – 22 – 25. For the most part, unless you decide to go on to grad school, you’re education is done. Think about it since the age 5 your job has been school. That’s your primary responsibility, the moving force in your life. Sure you may have had part-time jobs during high school and college but your primary goal was to complete your education, no matter how far you wanted to go with it. Then all of sudden – WAHM (no not work-at-home mom) you’re thrust into the “real world” with rent, utilities, student loans, credit card debt, insurance, car payments and the drudgery of a 40 hour work week. Sounds really appealing doesn’t it. Of course, who wouldn’t want to blow off a little steam now and then? Who wouldn’t throw caution to the wind and make decision that lack any amount of common sense? I did. I’m sure just about everyone I know did. As did many others out there. I didn’t have a husband, kids or a mortgage. I didn’t have anyone else dependent on me. My decisions didn’t really affect anyone else. Or did they? How easily some of my decision could have turned really bad, really fast for not only me, but people around me, total strangers.
Like I said, I’m so very thankful that nothing seriously bad happened because of my decisions. I’m thankful that my parents probably never fully knew all that I did (well, now they do). I’m thankful that no one got hurt. And I’m thankful that I grew out of it. That age was fun. I saw a lot, learned a lot about myself, and grew a lot. But I wouldn’t want to relive it – not in a million years.
Thought for Today June 16, 2009
So my youngest, single and child-less, sister is visiting with us this week. She came with me and the kids and experienced grocery shopping with two children the other day. As she was strolling down the aisle, much like I used to pre-children, I was wishing I had a cattle prod to move her along. For anyone who has never gone shopping with children, here is my Thought for Today. Grocery, or really any type of shopping, with small children is meant to be done quickly and with the least amount of trauma inflected on yourself, the children and the many other innocent customers/store employees you are bound to come in contact with.
Not As Easy As You Think June 9, 2009
For anyone that thinks being a SAHM or WAHM is “easy” – just as my husband. He was home today because of rain (his current project is building a barn) and he witnessed first hand what a normal day is like for me. Up at 6:30; get the kids dressed (not an easy task) and out the door to get Bug to school by 7:50. I actually “cheated” today and left Buddha home while I took Bug to school. But then there’s breakfast, cleaning up from breakfast and everyone making their lunches (of course, because no one else knows how to clean crumbs and tomatoe guts off the counter), laundry (never ending), picking up following after Buddha to pick up everything she gets into, check various e-mail accounts, phone constantly ringing, ironing, banking, errands, lunch, clean up after lunch, changing diapers, vaccuming, dusting, working on clients’ work/projects, trying unsuccessfully to get Budha to take a nap, going to get Bug from school, helping with homework, making snacks, cleaning up after snacks, figuring out what to make for dinner – hoping we have all the ingredients and that things will defrost in time, negotiating truces between Bug and Buddha, still trying to get Buddha to take a nap, re-check various e-mails, continue to work on clients’ work, figure out how to make a 7 year old un-bored, making dinner, cleaning up from dinner, folding laundry, getting Bug ready for school the next day, getting both kids bathed, trying to get both kids to bed, doing paperwork with my husband. And that list doesn’t even include days that I try to sneak in a workout at the gym, or start other projects around the house – like take inventory of my Avon products or the boxes upon boxes of kids clothes that I want to put into an on-line consignment store. I do sneak in a shower every day too. I’ve tried not taking a shower now and then but I just can’t do it.
So to all of you naysayers that think being a SAHM or WAHM is like sitting around all day watching soaps and getting ice cream – NOT! I challenge you to just visit a SAHM or WAHM for one day. By noon my husband was climbing the walls, and that’s only with one kid home. Just imagine what the summer is like. . .
Desperately Seeking . . . Myself June 6, 2009
Did you ever look in the mirror and wonder – who the hell is that staring back at me? Where did the young woman that worked 40 – 50 hours a week outside the home go? The one that would make nice romantic dinners for her husband without warning. The one that would enjoy spending time just doing nothing – maybe reading a book or doing some crafts. The one that would have “date night” with her husband once a week and take off for the weekend on a moments notice. You know the one. Where did she go? She’s there – a little gray in her hair (you should really take care of that woman in the mirror), a little more wrinkles around her eyes (can we say, “time for a facial”). She’s there – a little older and wiser (that’s debatable). She’s a mom now and a wife of almost 11 years. She works out of the home so she can be with her kids more than the babysitter. She tries to sneak in little things that she used to like to do now and then. She tries to remember who she used to be. . .
. . . Then she realizes who she used to be made her who she is today.
